Happiness – Why Not?

As a chiropractor practicing Neurologically Based Chiropractic, I feel very fortunate. Dealing in functional Neurology, I get to assist patients in reprogramming and tweaking their brain and nervous system, the very mechanism that expresses their humanity. We can take measurements before and after and understand that we have in effect improved people's quality of life and their health potential. It is very humbling and I take little credit for it, except for the fact that I have chosen it and devoted my life to it.

But then the next question has to be; what is it that makes the difference between the ones that get just a little better and those that completely transform and blossom; when we have looked at diet, exercise, fitness, weight, muscle balance, posture, brain waves, hand temperature, galvanic skin response, breath rate, heart rate, and heart rate variability. When we have improved all of those factors, what is it that makes one person feel better than another? What is it that makes one person have more joy and satisfaction in life?

And then it struck me. The answer is happiness. And then I realized - You are exactly as happy as you want to be. When all or most of the other factors are normalized, the remaining factor is the level of happiness that you have chosen.

Now since we're dealing with biology, living organisms and eco-systems, it is not possible to separate the brainwaves, heart rate variability, and health potential from happiness, because as you normalize brain function you will get happier and as you get happier you will normalize brain function. Yet you realize that our outlook on life, attitude, or level of happiness becomes the key factor in our quality of life.

All right then - So just be happy!

Then the realistic, honest person, thoroughly grounded in reality says - Sure, but it's not that easy. You can't be happy for no reason.

And that statement right there "You cannot be happy for no reason" is the problem. That is the grand human delusion. Mankind has been conditioned to believe that you need a reason to justify your happiness. In fact, we even make fun of people who appear to be happier than they "should"; those that are happier than what we think is appropriate or "normal" without a "valid" reason. We say that they must be on drugs, mentally challenged or we ascribe their inexplicable happiness to some other "abnormal" reason.

We have learned to base our feelings and our level of happiness on our circumstances and conditions. We believe that you need a reason to be happy, so we spend all of our time and effort trying to create conditions and circumstances that we define as "good" and "successful" so that we can feel happy when they line up for us. We are afraid of feeling good for no reason, because we think it makes us irresponsible. We believe that we won't get things done unless we worry about them first, during and after. We believe that we are lacking in integrity and character if we go around feeling good when "things are bad".

This belief, that we can only be happy when things go our way, and we automatically need to feel bad, when they are not, is nothing more than a belief, but it is so deeply conditioned that we don't even see it as a belief; we believe it's the way it is; as if it is built into the very fabric of existence.

So let's look at this concept with fresh new eyes. As it turns out there is no official universal law or man-made rule at all on the matter; not only are you free to be happy for no reason what so ever, it is the most natural thing to be.

So try to put aside all your previous notions for a moment and honestly ask yourself these questions.

• All other things being equal, would I rather be happy or miserable?
• When I have a pile of bills to pay; would I rather be a happy person paying bills or would I prefer to be a miserable person paying bills?
• Would I rather have a flat tire and feel good, or have a flat tire and feel bad?
• Would I rather be stuck in traffic and feel great, or would I rather sit in traffic and be angry?
• Would I rather be alone and happy or alone and sad?
• Would I rather be poor and happy or poor and miserable?
• Would I rather be rich and happy or rich and depressed?

You see happiness and the circumstance have nothing to do with each other unless your belief says they do.

When asking the questions like that, the obviousness of the truth shines through like a beam of light in the dark. In every single case; of course we would prefer to be happy. Then why aren't we? Why is it so difficult?

The complete answer is quite long and has been very well covered by many authors. (A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle is a great place to start)

The short answer is that there is a mechanism that makes you identify your "self" and your value with the situation that you are in. You identify with it and believe that you have to control it in some way. Then you get frustrated and feel bad when you realize that you can't control it. The whole problem is that you are identifying with the circumstance rather than realizing that you are independent of it.

You are not the traffic situation and the traffic situation is not you, but when you lose your awareness of"being", it becomes you. It has no power over you or how you feel unless you give it that power, and the way that you give it that power is through identification with it.

The mechanism that creates this identification is called the ego. The ego is the sum total of all the repetitious "noisy thoughts" in your head that in the average person goes on pretty much uninterrupted day in and day out.

The ego is not you, but it feels like you when you don't pay attention. You are not the thought. You are the one having the thought. You are the consciousness that can take a step back and question the validity of the thought. The ego has no capacity to step back and question the thought because it is the thought.

When you slow yourself down and observe your thoughts you become conscious. You detach yourself from the situation or circumstance and you are no longer controlled by it.

When you are identified with your ego, your stream of thoughts, it is impossible to feel good for no reason, because the ego only gets its value from identifying with things, concepts, ideas, people etc that makes it stand out and be special.

Happiness is our natural state of being, but the "state of being" is incompatible with the ego. Since the ego can only exist and have value through identification with external things, it can never rest. It needs to find new things and new places to identify with. This is why it is so difficult to be happy for no reason. In order to get to that point we need to create little breaks from identifying with the stream of thought; identification that has been practiced our entire life after age 1 or 2.

First we need to realize the value of feeling good. If we can break away from the ego for just a moment we can realize that feeling good is an end to itself, but if we cannot, the ego will convince us that it is wrong to feel good without having something new and better to identify with.

It is possible to start creating little gaps in the stream of thought, but it requires a willingness to look at things differently and it will take a lot of consistency and practice because we are so strongly conditioned to identify with our thoughts/ego.

Here's a way to start. Tell yourself - I would rather feel good. I realize that the events around me do not need to be controlled by me. They are fine the way they are and they have no desire or need to be controlled or fixed by me. Therefore I am free to let them be as they are.

Whenever I have a chance I will take a break and step back from my thoughts; take a deep breath and experience the perfection of the present moment. Clear your mind of thoughts for just the length of a slow exhalation (6-7 seconds) and ask yourself - How would I like to feel in this moment? Realize that how you feel is a choice and has nothing to do with anything external.

Repeat as needed any time you would like to feel happy. (Every moment of your existence)

Congratulations. You are well on your way to happiness and health.

Yours in Health and Joy,

Sten Ekberg D.C.